How Do You Speak to Yourself?
Do you talk to yourself lovingly and with compassion?
Or do you speak harshly to yourself and say things like “I should have done better” or “I’m such an idiot?”
We all have an inner critic, of course.
But for many that inner critic is the most active voice in our heads. It feeds us a daily running commentary of negative thoughts, often without our awareness.
So, let’s pause for a moment and ask ourselves how we experience negative self-talk.
- How do you feel when you say negative things to yourself?
- How does it make your body feel?
- Do you believe what you are telling yourself and feel the tension mounting in your body?
- Do you feel like you have opened a floodgate of self-loathing?
- Have others said the same or similar negative comments to you?
- When others speak to you that way, do you believe it?
- Have you thought about where or when the negative beliefs originated?
To develop and grow ourselves in any area, we need to “assess our performance”. We do this naturally as humans!
Just like a baby learning to walk – they stumble and fall and try again and again until they perfect the skill without ever believing themselves to be stupid, or slow, or incapable!
They stick with it and pursue their goal until they achieve it, without self-judgment.
And yet… somewhere along the way, that changes.
Instead of learning through experience, we begin judging ourselves for it.
That inner critic becomes louder. More constant. And over time, we stop questioning it and begin to accept it as truth. But it’s not truth. It’s a pattern. A learned way of thinking that can quietly hold you back without you even realizing it.
The way you speak to yourself matters. It affects how you feel, how you show up, and what you believe you’re capable of.
And most of the time, we’re not even aware it’s happening as it has become an unconscious habit.
That’s why awareness is such an important first step.
If you’re curious what patterns might be influencing you, I created a Self-Sabotage Quiz to help you see what may be operating underneath the surface.
It’s simple, but it can be eye-opening.
Positively empowering you®
Stacie
Have you ever felt like invisible forces are holding you back, even when you’re striving for more joy, success, or alignment in your life?
These unseen patterns—like procrastination, perfectionism, or negative self-talk—can quietly shape your decisions and keep you stuck in frustration, often without you even realizing it. But once you bring these habits into the light, you can break free from their grip.
That’s why I created the Self-Sabotage Quiz.
It’s a simple, insightful tool designed to help you recognize your dominant self-sabotage style and understand how it may be influencing your emotions, choices, and direction — especially during moments of stress or uncertainty.
My Self-Sabotage Quiz is free, thoughtful, and designed to support your deeper work of living with intention. Not only will you receive your personalized quiz results, but you’ll also gain valuable insights into your specific self-sabotaging trait and practical tools to help you move beyond it.
Live intentionally,
Stacie
