The fence and gates on the front of my home are causing an issue. The previous owner had them custom built from Ipe wood, also called Brazilian walnut, which is a beautiful exotic wood from Central and South America. The thing is, it’s heavy. Very, very heavy.
Some believe it to hands down be the best choice for a new deck. The keyword in that sentence is ‘deck.’ I’m dealing with fences and gates that need to easily open and close let alone be secured with a latch.
I live on a coastal barrier island in Southwest Florida. So basically my ‘dirt’ is ‘sand.’ Sand shifts. So, things constructed on it require a certain level of engineering, so they stay where you want them to. You know, things like footers. But I digress.
I’ve had these gates repaired a number of times as the latches keep failing. They fail because the fence shifts causing the latches to misalign. On goes the bungee cord, in comes the fence guy to make an adjustment, it latches, and a week or two later, same issue. I prefer things to be in good working order and perform the way they were intended to! I’m a little picky that way.
I have done my best with this fence, even investing $1000 into a ‘permanent fix’ which was not so permanent, because, well, it’s Ipe wood set who knows how in the sand. Is it even set in concrete? I suppose so but who knows!
My neighbors tell me the previous owner paid quite a lot to install this fence and was very proud of the beautiful Ipe wood. But you know what? It’s not my job to preserve his dream. Which brings us to insight number one in this tale of mine.
Insight #1: Release the burden of responsibility for preserving someone else’s expectations.
As I said, I invested a thousand dollars trying to repair this fence as I did, indeed, want to preserve it, appreciating that it’s Ipe wood, appreciating that erecting it cost him a tidy sum, and realizing that replacing it isn’t inexpensive either and that was surely my responsibility. I made a good, solid effort at saving this fence, but the fence is no longer serving me well. So, my point to you is if you are wrestling with a situation, stop to consider who is responsible for what in that situation and if it’s serving your best self.
There is a second insight in this paragraph. Did you notice it?
Insight #2: Define your personal boundaries.
Boundaries serve as vital benchmarks, rules, or limits that we establish for our own well-being. I reached a breaking point with the persistent issues surrounding my fence, encompassing frustration, security concerns, and financial expenditure. While my challenge centered on a mere gate, the broader lesson is applicable to life at large: the importance of delineating personal boundaries and acting when they’re crossed. Adhering to these boundaries not only respects one’s needs but also fosters decisions that align with one’s values and needs, thereby enhancing emotional well-being. In essence, recognizing, articulating, and upholding your personal boundaries is an empowering journey.
Now to my next insights!
Insight #3: Cultivating a Resilient Inner Foundation
In both structures and life, a strong foundation is paramount. Take my fence, for instance; its foundation failed to support the structure due to a misapplication of materials. This real-world lesson echoes a deeper truth about our personal journeys: the necessity for a robust inner foundation. Just as a building needs the right groundwork to withstand external forces, we too require a solid personal foundation — comprised of our values, beliefs, and inner strength — to stand resilient against the myriad of pressures life presents. This inner grounding equips us to face life’s challenges with unwavering strength and confidence.
Insight #4: Embracing the Shift of Personal Growth
Much like the sands that shift beneath a fence, our inner landscape undergoes changes as we journey through life. It’s vital to recognize these internal shifts and allow our foundational beliefs to evolve. Staying rooted in an outdated or unsupportive foundation can hinder our growth. Embracing change, on the other hand, ensures that we continuously renew and adapt, remaining in harmony with our evolving selves.
Reflections and an Invitation to Elevate Your Life®!
As I embark on the journey of installing a new fence and gates, I view this as more than just a home improvement; it’s a testament to self-improvement. It’s about discerning when to hold on and when to let go, when to build resilience, and when to embrace change. With every latch, hinge, and plank, I’m reminded of the ever-evolving nature of life and the profound impact of our inner foundations. So, as I make my change, I invite you to reflect: What foundations in your life are you re-evaluating, strengthening, or shifting?”
If my journey with a simple fence can offer this many insights, just imagine the depth and clarity I can bring to your life. As a dedicated Modern Consciousness Coach®, I invite you to join me in my Elevate Your Life® program. Together, we can unearth the lessons hidden in your experiences, guiding you toward a life of greater purpose and fulfillment. Are you ready to elevate?”